Musings

 I continue to change a lot. It feels like I am getting a better feel for what I am doing. It feels good. There appears to be a great quantity to process, which can be daunting, but, this process seems to be governed by forces that can be known and depended upon. It seems that the more clearly I perceive this, the steadier my hand will be. The more certainty I will have about the consequences of my actions, and the results of my efforts. Certainty that what I am doing will bring about what I think it will. It appears that manipulation of elements for selfish gain creates a blindness which inherently upsets the efforts made to reach particular goals. It makes the fulfillment of the goals unavoidably uncertain, which renders this approach unfitting if one wishes to have security in their endeavors. If one wishes to be able to depend upon their efforts. Otherwise, it is always a gamble, which eventually will end in ruin. They whom are ruled by their ego continue in their pursuit of power and mastery because they fail to see this and believe they can outwit the universe, they by their time until they are powerful enough to challenge the powers that be, they may succeed for a time, yet their sole trust in themselves will be their undoing, because in doing so they fail to see the greater order at work. They are blinded by their own power and wit. They fail to recognize that their personal power is a subset of a greater order to which all of this power and personal intelligence belongs and is governed by. This selfishness itself is the act of turning away from this greater order, which is it's ignorance, and it's doom. It is belief in the wisdom of turning to one's own cleverness and spurning the order and will of the greater world. It is drunk in the pursuit of personal power. It is yet ignorant of much that lies outside and beyond it. 

Moving beyond, one turns from this draught to the light of the existent order of things, and the light flows through the mind and the body as it hasn't before. Here, it seems, that intelligence takes precedence over want. Want is subject to the way things work. It is seen that this order cannot be bypassed by desire. It is something to navigate, not to dominate, this is impossible and undesirable because the light of the order is far more tolerable than the dark prison of selfish desire. This selfishness can only beat off suffering at best, while the light of order allows one to rise out of it with increasing certainty. Certainty that comes with knowledge and trust. Here one learns to transform selfish desire into consciousness. And with consciousness comes skillfullness. With intelligence it seems that you can do anything. There is no end to what the mind can achieve with intelligence. The aim isn't to eliminate the base, but to grow out from it. To carry it further than ever before.