Multitude and Reality

We have this existence in the temporal which is largely if not completely illusory. Here things appear separate and are treated so. I am this organism and you are that organism. This is this thing and that is that thing. Within this we find a sense of unity and singleness. And deeper still and more on the surface, the whole itself. Do parts exist or are they completely illusory? What is the nature of the whole? It seems like this universe only exist as long as there is egoic consciousness. It also seems like this universe may be a playground for the divine. Which is a wild notion. It seems like the notion that what we see and experience is just a part and not the whole is definitely an illusion. I think the nature of reality is in fact spaceless and timeless. We imagine the whole as this space with parts in it, that are somehow not separate. I think at least one of the main aspects of the whole, of what is real, that makes real real is not something tangible. I am taking this in leaps, bear with me. What we see as the separate part is not actually a separate part. It must also be what is real, what is intangible. What we see if it is illusion or not is a real phenomena, it is, even if it appears to be other than it is. There is the saying, "Confirmed by the 10,000 things." We are confirmed by the multitude because we see each thing as what is real. We see the part as truth. Yet at this point is the part still illusory. We wake up as truth within a field of illusion it seems. What does it mean to be real? What the fuck is reality? I guess what is here as opposed to what is not. It seems that I feel real when I see things as they are. I guess what I am wondering is, is everything I see illusory? Chair, table, computer, peanut butter jar. Are my eyes bewitched? Is this whole plane of existence an illusion? I think it is. It doesn't seem to have any body that we imagine it to. It seems lighter than air. Thinner than air. It almost feels as if it is made to be this way and not any other way. Like it is perfect as it is. Like it is ok to be contained within it. It's like I am contained within it, yet I am certainly not contained within it because it has no reality. I guess the real question is, is peanut butter really peanut butter? Maybe yes and no. I don't think me waking up is going to eliminate peanut butter from the world, but maybe it will in the way. Maybe peanut butter won't be the same peanut butter that it used to be. If everything I am saying is true then peanut butter is actually God. Table is God. Couch is God. Is it God and also itself? Does it remain a couch? Does it remain peanut butter? Or are these unique formations merely a play of light and darkness and nothing tangible is real? Hard to say. If it weren't real then how could we get to a point where we think that it is. How can we perceive otherwise? How can we see colors and how can there be different atomic structures? What is our brain translating into perception? How could there be bodies and animals and such? If none of this is real then how could any illusion come into existence? How could there be thought? How could there be an illusion at all? WTF? Well if time and space aren't real than nothing we perceive as time or space is actually bound by any of the laws that govern time or space. If they aren't real then the law of reality is beyond understanding. Damn. So what is real may not be anything that we can reason out, but may be so just because it is. Damn. So what is real is real because it is, not because of any reason, unless reason happens to be the reason it is real, but it doesn't have to be. Lol. What I am sensing is that much of what I perceive about the world is an illusion. An illusion being something that appears to be other than it is. Also that there is something real about all of this. I may not be able to define what is real or if this is real, but I think that in some way it is. Right-o